It's better to be hated for who u r, then to be loved by who u aren't*

where should i start where should I end what is the begining what is my end
scanity is exscaping me love but a memory where to start where to end when can i quit this game and say ive had enof the money is no there and the government wont help i can take it any more what should i do im taiered of hideing but afrade to tell the truth what is my begining and what is my end

some times the conversations about nothing mean the most

Me and my cuz sat and just had a good bull sestion and it was great i mean i just talked about what ever I wanted to talk about and it just took a load off my chest :)

I have a few questions for you
when you no longer want to go forword
what do you do?

im sitting here tonight and im thinking that its almost time for me to graduate and i have no idea what i want to do exsept stand still and injoy life as it is with out any serious troubles. with out worry and with out the real world vering its ugly head in and saying that im nolonger goodenof to be here.

Im afrade to go and and im afrade to stand still and most off all i am terrafide of going backwards.


SO i have one simple question...

What do you do when your afrade to start liveing and you dont wana start dieing?

Hey guys dont know what to do any more there are some strange events happaning and im kinda dont know what to do about it first of all there are 2 ppl i like both are single and both would not give me the time of day romanticly but both probly would go to prom with me if i asked

Another year older and another year wiser i guss but yet another year that my life seems to lose all it meaning and i know yet agin im gona end up crying tomarrow till i cant any more Its always the same every year for a wile now guss this is just my present to my self kinda wish i could be happy like most people my age... well the ones that thay want us to think are the majority at least



Night all guss ill go and get ready my B day is tomarrow i need to get a good box of tissue

A tost to living a life that makes ya cry every year yall

P.S. dont say happy birthday i can guaratee it wont be see yall at school

Howdy yall i aint been hearin much fur a lil wile now so i am r gon be postin :)

How yall been?
what yall been in to?


answer this if yall love me :)


I better see Coments or ill be maaaadddddd

Wow guys i am auctly updateing lol


Aint this just niffty lol so any more a typical day in my life is trowing up sleeping and playing wow aint that fun lol

Love yall so much hope ya have some fun out there in the wonderful part of life thay call socal





Brandon M. Thacker
Love not lost just simply forgoten

hey guys i realy dont know what to do any more out of the 3 ppl that i care what think of me one thinks im a lier one i get on there nerves and the outher one never talks to me any more ... im haveing problems and i dont know who to turn to out of all the things in the world only one seems to make me happy and yet its starting to coz me problems... i need an excape and i need some one to help me in this life and yet no one cares anymore and i dont blame them im starting to quit careing... ok ive given up and i dont know what i plan on doing i realy havent thought that far yet but all i know is im gona get wrap up all my lose ends soon even thow im not planing on leaveing now i dont want anything left to be taken care of by my friends and family i love you all so much and the ones i love them most hate me so guss what im done with this and all thats left now rember a wile back i asked you not to cry for me that means ever so right now is the time for you to see if you realy care about me ... dont Cry never cry it taints your beautaful faces ... well with this i think i shall go



Brandon M. Thacker
This might be Goodbye

a couple of weeks ago my friend heard that i was talking about her.... ofcourse i was not thow.... but she seems to belive it and i dont blame her something she only told me got out and i know i dident tell it but she only told me so i dont blame her for beliveing it i know it sounds fishy but i realy dident say anything
well nowadays not being able to talk to her is realy hurting coz she was one of the few ppl in the world i cared what thay thought... one of the veary few that could talk seance into me ... and the only one that could make me fill bad about something i use to do that i need to fill bad about.

this post is detacated to her even if she reads it or not it has made me fill a lot better

i didnt mean to hurt her ever and some how i did even thow i dident do anything the person knows who im talking about as do most of you but still for her privacy i will not metion her name i realy hope that she and him will stay together for a long time even thow she dose not aparently think i do ...



Brandon M. Thacker
Missing one of his true friends

SOME ONE told me to post this so i did...





THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. brandon
2. shoe head
3. skittles
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. purplemonky2002
2. love_not_lost_3
3. brandon.thacker
THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. my heart
2. My abilaty to love you all
3. My abilaty to make yall smile
THREE THINGS YOU HATE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My weight
2. My face
3. My destany
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. briths
2. irish
3. native american
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Being alone forever
2. going numb
3. love
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. music
2. friends
3. games
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. left sock
2. pants
3. right sock
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS/ARTISTS RIGHT NOW:
1. def leppord
2. HIM (but im not obsest)
3. fallout boy
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
1. all i want is everything - def leppord
2. now - def leppord
3. pour some suger on me - def leppord
THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT YEAR:
1. Get a degree
2. Get a tattoo
3. Be in a relationship that works for once
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP, BESIDES LOVE:
1. Communication
2. Cuddling
3. trust
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE (OR SAME) SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. Chubby
2. eyes that you can get lost in
3. able to make me happy
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
1. I am Afraid of life
2. I am perfectly happy with the way my life is st the moment.
3. I am a boy.
THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1. hurt someones feelings.
2. Get over my fear of heights.
3. Get along with every one.
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Reading
2. GAMES
3. MORE GAMES
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. smile
2. Lose weight
3. be loved
THREE CAREERS YOU ARE CONSIDERING:
1. I.T.
2. cheif
3. compy enganeer
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. scotland
2. irerland
3. any where with the ones i love
THREE KIDS NAMES:
1. Braston
2. Shantil
3. Shela
THREE PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO ADD THIS TO THEIR JOURNAL NOW OR DIE PAINFULLY:
1. you
2. the person sitting next to you
3. the person in you closet

Much love
Brandon M. Thacker

ps
my crush is some one you know person who told me to post this

ok i dont know what to post but i wana post so this is what im doing lol im just gona rat about how i dont know what to post untill i figure out what to post lol

oh i joined FBLA and the Chess club today i fill like a geek even more now lol

starting to develop a new crush but i dont even know if i want to get started in all that trouble agin i mean eavery time i do i just get so down coz no one in there right mind would ever want me lol


well i am starting to runout of things to say ... oh well love yall so much hope yall are happy and if you ever need some one to talk to plz just msg me or call me im always here its not like i have a life or anything.... keep the love flowin yall







Brandon M. Thacker
"dont cry over me"

hey guys with all the chest pains i have had recently it has made me realize what i want to happen if something happens to me...

1 dont cry i could not stand seeing you cry in life there for dont cry in my death

2 dont let people go on about how i died so young tell ya the truth i have lived so much thanks to all of you
and i think you all for this

3 if you see something that would remind you of me... LAUGH you know thats what i would want with out me telling you

4 just rember that everything is done for a reason


love yall so much

Brandon M. Thacker

hey guys

hey guys sup how is every one well no one can ever say i rush things but do i wait to long is my new question... as many of you know im kinda waiting on an dission to a question i asked a wile back and now evey one tells me i wait in vain and i should give up... sometimes i belive them and then i talk to her and i cant belive that she is just useing me i dont care what ppl say... im just kinda getting tired of waiting i understand that she needs time and im not gona rush her but who knows how long i can wait dose she do i dose anyone on this earth... well guys i love yall lots i kinda hope she reads this but hey if she dont i still got to rant about it lol







Brandon M. Thacker
ill wait for as long as my heat tells me to...

hey guys sup yall im about to ask some one out to the homecomeing dance thinking about doing it eyther monday or friday cross your fingers and wish me luck...



well much love yall ppl tell me i need to post more and i will even if it is just thies lil short ones


Brandon M. Thacker
SHHH i got a secret





Ps hay lil sis much love

ok guys today was great untill break at the end of break i could not breat and had chest pains i realy couldednt keep my self up standing much longer so i went on to class where i just sat there and i stiill was haveing trouble breathing so i slumped down and about went to sleep i stayed like that till about 10 min befor the bell rang then i went and ran some arrents for miss burk

but i told alex that i would call her tonight hopefuly i can get her over donnie soon i cant stand to see her hurt it realy kills me inside


im gona go laydown im starting to get lightheaded agin love yall





Brandon M. Thacker
im scared of what i cant controll

howdy guys and girls if you cant tell by whats going on with my icon im starting to come out about being BI i am proud of it and i dont care who knows anymore I love who i am i have known for years now and i finaly can be open about it



Love yall hope you all have a great day and any hot guys or girls who what to talk at me just msg me on yahoo purplemonky2002 and any one who wants to bash me use ICQ plz 334271027



Brandon M. Thacker
Bisexual and proud

Current Mood: chipper

ok guys i am starting to think foot ball is good now i sill hate the sport but i like going to games agin lol you see i was at the game lastnight and alex was there and so was donnie well after a wile like pegining of the 3rd me and alex finaly talked to donnie well he told her who he liked and the reason he left her.. then when he left alex just droped to the ground crying... well no one elts even botherd to act like thay cared well i droped down and sat beside her and held her well she starts crying on me and i was trying to confert her well after a wile we walked to the trailor trying to keep her mind off him we started puting this up well this dident work to well but after we got up to the stands i finaly got her to smile agin and laghfe i made her a deal i told her that with in 2 weeks i would get her over donnie and by the end of the day she was almost over him... well i think that im gona do everything i can to get that girl to be happy agin

recently i have lost a lot of sleep thinking about things im realy wasent shore about and after talking to a few ppl things have became a lot easyer i truly think i have made the right desision and i hope to tell every what it is soon so if ya wana know just ask me if i want you to know ill tell ya dont think that i am mad at your or it invoves you if i dont tell you its just that Im not shore every one should know yet but soon thay will well much love yall hope to see ya soon each and every one of ya



Brandon M. Thacker
lost and forgoten